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The press trampled on my privacy. Here's how I took back my story | Kate Stone

839 ratings | 33929 views
After a horrific accident put her in the tabloid headlines, Kate Stone found a way to take control of her narrative -- and help prevent others from losing their privacy, too. Learn how she reclaimed her story in this personal talk infused with humor and courage. Check out more TED Talks: http://www.ted.com The TED Talks channel features the best talks and performances from the TED Conference, where the world's leading thinkers and doers give the talk of their lives in 18 minutes (or less). Look for talks on Technology, Entertainment and Design -- plus science, business, global issues, the arts and more. Follow TED on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/TEDTalks Like TED on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TED Subscribe to our channel: https://www.youtube.com/TED
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Text Comments (119)
ZiemniakPospolity (2 months ago)
Leftists should take a lesson from people like Kate Stone. She is a transgender, but did she focus on that topic? No, instead of she offers an interesting one. Do people smash her with hate? No, everyone supported her and there are only 65 unlikes, so it's nothing. When you behave normally, don't try to force anything, you have the whole normal society (or maybe up to 95% of it, because there are always rew idiots anyway) behind you. You have to face the whole "hate" and "resistance" when you play the victim card and you are unable to speak about any different topic but discrimination.
ZiemniakPospolity (1 month ago)
+Kate Stone Thank you very much for your comment, it is the first time when a TED-speaker answers me personally ;D I really admire your way of thinking, it reminds me of my favourite astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson and his not-mentioning his race, but focusing on the science and knowledge he has. Outstanding, please carry on.
Kate Stone (1 month ago)
ZiemniakPospolity thank you for sharing that comment, you describe exactly how I try to live my life, I focus every day on who I am rather than what I am and feel lucky to have friends on both the left and right. The first talk I did at TED was totally focused on my work, I was told I was the first transgender person to speak at TED, it was very important to me to not talk about that at all. I wanted to inspire through my work rather than anything else. It has made me sad to have to speak about it since because of what happened, but I do it because I believe I’m able to show that we can do this with kindness and understanding rather than criticism and condemnation. I have made some wonderful friends who actually worked at those papers that wrote the stories. I would much rather spend my time in a sensible conversation with someone on the right than complaining about the world with a ‘leftie’, and I am a ‘leftie’ myself :)
Jared Begg (5 months ago)
not to get into the pronouns/gender discussion others have commented on.... whatever one feels about that, the statement that a a gender transition is LESS interesting than a shoe size is blatantly out of touch with reality. whether you're progressive or traditional regarding gender and transition, it's still, quite obviously, an interesting issue. i'm amazed that statement got applause and laughter rather than confusion.
Jared Simpson (6 months ago)
'I'm transgender, its not a big deal.' Lets get the other half of the world on this page.
bob bob (6 months ago)
So the Sun thinks it's okay to violate privacy, but not okay to get mad if your privacy was violated? It's not "bigoted" to stand up for yourself against someone who sees you as a headline and not a human being. Just cause she was sneaky about it and polite, doesn't mean she wasn't trying to seek revenge.
Christine L.M (6 months ago)
If ‘kindness Ninjas’ like you are at their table, why are they still trying to ruin lives I wonder. Money!
thou ist (6 months ago)
Tbh, i reckon the daily mail is more of the uk's fox news than the sun. It focuses way more on politics than the sun, which whilst it will do a bit of politics, it cares way more about celebrity stories
Faekor (6 months ago)
I thought she was a women at first with a messed up voice due to surgery.
jalt_03 (6 months ago)
I love this! Good on Dr. Stone for advocating for herself :)
Angie Murry (6 months ago)
Wow! I got gored in the leg by my own goat three weeks ago and I thought I was a trooper! I’m so glad you are doing well. 💜
Shamsul Alam (6 months ago)
Good topic
Anodyne Melody (6 months ago)
This was a powerful talk, all of us on Earth would benefit from "identifying out inner bigotry" and working to overcome it. She transformed anger into kindness and the result was society taking a microscope to everyone's own mistakes and collaborating to make journalism more ethical, and the world a better place. Relating to and trying to understand our adversaries is one of the most difficult processes to begin and it's even harder to finish it successfully, but the potential benefits include preventing conflicts of every scale and intensity, including armed conflict. We should all be thanking this woman!
prysmcat (6 months ago)
Thank you, Ms Stone, for having the strength not to lash out in blind anger under provocation like that, and to bring about something constructive from it - and then to share it with us here, in a culture in which far too many people consider voicing their own narrow and destructive perspective more important than simply treating you with respect.
Ramza Beoulves (6 months ago)
Great talk, great person
David (6 months ago)
That's not a woman, that's a man. Sick
E (6 months ago)
I’m reporting you for harassment
Ramza Beoulves (6 months ago)
Very much a woman but with twice your balls
Ray Ray (6 months ago)
That's a dude
urbanrat84 (6 months ago)
I need to take back my story from a person in my life who is busily rewriting my past. Good message thank you
Optical Clarity (6 months ago)
Did someone claim you raped them 36 years ago with zero evidence & zero corroboration & then the press start calling for a kangaroo court, no due process & no presumption of innocence & the slander and defame you?
jd (6 months ago)
How is it that I immediately could tell this is a man?
Ramza Beoulves (6 months ago)
Joy Haria (6 months ago)
if we are a billion lightyears away from earth and we see earth from there will we see earth from a billion years ago
make0urday66 (6 months ago)
Terrifying, absolutely terrifying.
R A R E V A L U E O0 (6 months ago)
journals were trying to get not get a lawsuit ?
MissLilyputt (6 months ago)
We need to support good writers and not click baity, sensationalist or simply plagiarized writing. There are so many people who say they’re tired of this kid of writing and reporting and yet that’s the most popular. Terrible writing is promoted on aggregate websites, on social media, and by word of mouth. When we decide to stop clicking on crap and use that time instead to read well thought out articles and essays then there will be a change for the better. The law of supply and demand applies to even this.
Anodyne Melody (6 months ago)
First we need to educate people about media literacy, and improve literacy of all kinds in general. But, yes I agree completely! :)
revisionfour (6 months ago)
Do you and all but don't expect everyone is willing to call someone her with he parts and he vocal cords. Humans are naturally wired to distinguish genders. It's hard for many to tell the brain she when the brain says he. It's fighting your built in logic system wired to detect genders.
E (6 months ago)
Her name is Kate Stone. A woman’s name. She has long hair and is wearing a blouse and makeup. It’s very obvious that she’s a woman.
Ramza Beoulves (6 months ago)
Trans don't expect people to get it right all the time, the bare minimum is to use the right pronoun once/if you know the person's gender
Kaito McVey (6 months ago)
This was excellent.
Ivory (6 months ago)
Yes Kate! You go girl!
freespeech ordeath (6 months ago)
Title had my hopes up thinking TED was going to address the hypocrisy and insanity of what the media has become and instead its a dude thinking he's a woman. Wtf
invincible will (6 months ago)
#Special & big ""Thanks"" for including ""HINDI"" in caption..
David Peters (6 months ago)
There is another scenario where people of a certain ilk write "inappropriate and negative" comments … calculated to influence people who read them … have you had a look at your NHS medical records lately? I told my practice nurse I was into Yoga and Mindfulness … and jokingly said I was: "Trying to reboot my brain". She left a comment in my medical records … "He says he is trying to reboot his brain." … no mention of Yoga and Mindfulness. I slipped over and broke my whilst whilst walking on a muddy common … the hospital note read: "Broken wrist … dishevelled". I had a minor, low-key disagreement with a nurse at a hospital clinic … my GP was told that I had had "an argument with the staff".
BrazilianBikini38 (6 months ago)
5:26 "they asked me to join the committee that regulates the press". In Great Britain that says it all
Dajana Darling (6 months ago)
Wow. What a grown-up reaction from your side. And such a rewarding outcome. I'm happy for you <3
Jeremy Harden (6 months ago)
That has to be a man
E (6 months ago)
She says right in the talk that she’s transgender. Did you even watch the video before posting this bigot comment?
X X (6 months ago)
People like you kinda prove her point. So many idiots in this world.
André (6 months ago)
Old women have sagging skin too
TestMeatDollSteak (6 months ago)
She sounds like a man...
E (6 months ago)
Jeremy Harden such bigotry
Ramza Beoulves (6 months ago)
Sandra, That's why there are people trying to educate you on the subject so you can help build a better world. There's a huge difference between benig unsure what pronoun to use and insisting on using the wrong one after being explicitely told that she is now a woman. Trans go through a lot and have a much harder shell than you seem to think. As far as I know, all they're asking is the slightest bit of respect as every eprson should expect.
Sandra (6 months ago)
Jstarstudios so complicated - I think transgendered people will need to do a lot of work in therapy to not be triggered if someone calls them by their original gender. Because it will always happen. Because not everyone views this in the same way. Just reality.
Sandra (6 months ago)
Anita X an idiot because they said that she sounds like a man?! Read the thread.
X X (6 months ago)
People like you kinda prove her point. So many idiots in this world.
Isaac The Fallen Apple (6 months ago)
What an incredible woman
MajkaSrajka (6 months ago)
Whan an incredible person.
Space (6 months ago)
nameless rando (6 months ago)
Not the video for it, but yes.
Bree Evans (6 months ago)
Trampled in the throat? Get out of here, you ironically are ignoring everything she says because she's trans, which is what she's literally fighting against.
DURMUŞ BAYSAL (6 months ago)
Indeed, Allah orders justice and good conduct and giving to relatives and forbids immorality and bad conduct and oppression. He admonishes you that perhaps you will be reminded. (The Noble Qur'an. Surah An Nahl. Verse:90) Know that the life of this world is but amusement and diversion and adornment and boasting to one another and competition in increase of wealth and children (The Noble Qur'an. Surah Hadid. Verse:20) Every soul will taste death. Then to Us will you be returned. And those who have believed and done righteous deeds - We will surely assign to them of Paradise [elevated] chambers beneath which rivers flow, wherein they abide eternally. Excellent is the reward of the [righteous] workers. (The Noble Quran. Surah Al Ankabut. Verse 57-58) Listen to the voice of the Noble Quran. Maybe your life will be changed If God allows. French : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lVY8pwx9B74 English: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Omh4oG8T_Fw German: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EXWTxB6oS6I
DURMUŞ BAYSAL (6 months ago)
+Eadgyt Adba Francis Bacon tells us: Having little knowledge about science makes the man an atheist. Having a deep knowledge of science makes a man who believes in God.
DURMUŞ BAYSAL (6 months ago)
+Eadgyt Adba That is Allah, your Lord; there is no deity except Him, the Creator of all things, so worship Him. And He is Disposer of all things. ( The Noble Quran. Surah Al An'am. Verse 102) www.quran.com
DURMUŞ BAYSAL (6 months ago)
+Eadgyt Adba Had there been within the heavens and earth gods besides Allah, they both would have been ruined. So exalted is Allah, Lord of the Throne, above what they describe. (The Noble Quran. Surah Al Anbya. Verse 22)
Eadgyt Adba (6 months ago)
Hahaha Good one!
DURMUŞ BAYSAL (6 months ago)
+Eadgyt Adba Only smart people know how to love. So you've been deprived of love for the rest of your life. The source of all love is our God. Go back to your Lord and love him, and He will guide you to the right way. So after death, the Day of Resurrection, Become one of the great reward of your Lord. "Invite to the way of your Lord with wisdom and good instruction, and argue with them in a way that is best. Indeed, your Lord is most knowing of who has strayed from His way, and He is most knowing of who is [rightly] guided. (The Noble Quran. Surah An Naml. Verse 125) www.quran.com
Oddsors (6 months ago)
"But don't you think it's our job as journalists to sensationalize a story?" I guess that type of thinking makes sense in the clickbait-era, but I'd prefer less sensationalism personally.
less sensationalism? I would prefer just the facts without even a hint of sensationalism or a slant towards one political ideology or the other. I'm from a time when there were only three big channels and the news was more fact based and journalists had ethics and actually did research.
shadfurman (5 months ago)
(Most) news agencies are companies, they have customers and a profit motive. If people decide they want facts over sensationalism, they will get that. Most people prefer their flavor of sensationalism that supports their ideological world view.
TheGalacticGrizzly (6 months ago)
Tabloids and paparazzi existed long before the internet came about
MissLilyputt (6 months ago)
It’s the law of supply and demand at work. As long as people are clicking on and sharing this kind of content then there will be more created. It’s what people actually want because that’s the crap they choose to consume.
Optical Clarity (6 months ago)
What a Sad commentary on the state of so-called journalism today... that the journalist job is to sensationalize? Have these idiots even heard of journalistic ethics?
Karl Rosenbaum (6 months ago)
God bless your steps Miss Stone. You are so brave for sharing your story with the world. I'm sure you are helping a lot of people.
SetneuF (6 months ago)
its a tranny
Dani l (6 months ago)
Great talk!!
물고기 (6 months ago)
Our tabloid press are deplorable, all of them are bad but the s*n and the mail in particular are truly evil publication which have caused devastating harm to society this past decade. Fucking mad story too a bloody stag ?!
Loi PhamNgoc (6 months ago)
물고기 z
Alpha Strength (6 months ago)
Love the background from the stage
Lee Olsson (6 months ago)
That’s a lovely message. Thank you.
J Black (6 months ago)
This why we need Trump #MAGA
Anodyne Melody (5 months ago)
+Claire Conover When I wrote "Don't feed the troll OP", I was referring to the OP as the troll --> "troll OP" = "troll-OP" or "OP-troll".
Claire Conover (5 months ago)
Anodyne Melody j black is the OP. how do you not know that?
Anodyne Melody (6 months ago)
Don't feed the troll OP. If he's not trolling, then l feel sorry for the OP for so firmly believing in lies, misinformation, and propaganda distributed by a pathological liar and clinically-diagnosable narcissist who actually cares very little for his own supporters, I mean his first big action was passing a corporate tax cut that will eventually disintegrate the federal budget that goes toward taking care of and defending his own political base/constituency. Trump is only looking out for one guy, himself, and that is abundantly clear to anyone who actually stop and thinks about the actions he takes every day. @J Black can you explain your rationale for why you believe "this" is "why we need Trump"? Or are just trolling to get a rise out of people because you take pleasure in seeing people get upset online?
Gaf Hadly (6 months ago)
Are you completely delusional? Trump LIVES for media sensationalism. He built his whole campaign on it - "lock her up", "build the wall", mocking disabled people, locking kids up in cages, etc, etc,. Short messages for dumb people like you to be able to digest. If from this talk you got that we need more trump you are quite stupid. The message is actually the exact opposite.
Claire Conover (6 months ago)
TheRealRobs E ... and trump’s never criticized a democrat. oh wait, he has! again, your gullible mind is consuming & regurgitating someone else’s talking points. you must have no confidence in your own intelligence, since you obviously prefer to parrot out somebody else.
Jens S. (6 months ago)
Just wonderful!
nnaenae (6 months ago)
Beware of your inner bigot. Yes, thank you for that nugget of wisdom.
TheGalacticGrizzly (6 months ago)
Love her positive attitude!
Lirio2u (6 months ago)
Thank you Dr. Stone for teaching us to listen and to reply with kindness and patience.
Kyota Tsushima (6 months ago)
Ma näen ...
Jazzy Baby (6 months ago)
She sound like a dude
RedJohn260 (4 months ago)
cus it's a TRAP.... I like how all of the TRAP lovers here got triggered just cus you said she sound like a dude.
X X (6 months ago)
People like you kinda prove her point. So many idiots in this world.
DEUS VULT (6 months ago)
+SharpOB lmao
marlou9645 (6 months ago)
Jazzy Baby You can erase your comment
SharpOB (6 months ago)
He is a dude. A mentally ill dude.
This Awesome Channel (6 months ago)
who loves TED ? guys welcome to my AWESOME channel. Love ya all
E (6 months ago)
Reported for spam
Vanessa Firpo (6 months ago)
Ecrcx csee62t51photo 4th rffr6b. Cc4guhescfjg
Claire Conover (6 months ago)
it’s not cool to spam.
Michelle Stella (6 months ago)
+Gamer 49 😂
Gamer 49 (6 months ago)
I like Ted, but why would I subscribe to a gossip channel?

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